ic contact post

[therealgenius]

You've reached the voicemail feature for Justin Hammer. I apologize for any inconvenience I may have caused by being unable to answer your call, but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you, and have a good day.

Comments

pees self laughing

[therealgenius]

Yeah, that's the thing with addiction, isn't it? You think you can have just one and you do, but next time it's two, and it just goes right back into it all over again.

You don't do that a lot, do you? Bar people from entering. Even when he's indisposed at the desk, hmm?

them's sketti's good

[manofiron]

Precisely. I am pleased to see that he has not filled the void with something else. I thought soft drink consumption was headed in that direction, but he does not over indulge in that either.

Unless it is a matter of Mr. Stark's safety, I follow his instructions.

He did not instruct me to bar Ms. Potts from the workshop on the instance to which I believe you are subtly referring.

daylishus

[therealgenius]

Well, that's good. Soft drinks bloat you up, I think. Make you fat.

Tell me something this: is that the strangest thing she's caught him doing? Has she caught him going at with someone? Is she paid enough fo rthat?

ya make the sauce out o' butter an' ketchup

[manofiron]

Next time I see him pick up a can of Coca-Cola I will remind him of that fact.

That was relatively mild, I think. She has walked in on him having sexual relations more than once, if the stories I've heard are true. But that was many years ago.

even paula deen would go YUCK

[therealgenius]

Maybe wait til the third can in six hours. You know, if he goes for that sort of thing.

She didn't appear to have PTSD, did she?

their tastebuds must be dead

[manofiron]

He can consume a pot of coffee in an hour. I believe it safe to say that he can go for that kind of thing.

She appeared to take it in stride. The first time was a bit alarming, however subsequent incidents helped to desensitize her.

or covered in so much grease they can't taste anything anymore

[therealgenius]

That's kind of terrifying. No one should go through that much coffee--how the hell does his digestive system still properly function?

Okay, can I make a request? If he's doing anything like that with me or because of me, and she comes around, can you just--deny her access? For me?

G R O S S

[manofiron]

We do what we can to counteract his poor dietary habits. The smoothies may not always be the most appetizing, but they are nutritious.

Of course, sir.

I might add that allowing her access to the workshop during the incident in question was deliberate. I'm not in the habit of doing it otherwise.

trashy, gross, one might say...tasteless, even.

[therealgenius]

Oh, I know. I had a bit of one once. Rabbit food is never the greatest, especially if it's prepared by

if it's not prepared with great care.

I'm sure she appreciated it. Really. Do you two not get along, or was it just for funsies?

PUNS

[manofiron]

You will not offend me. You may call us what we are.

Two days prior, he and I had an argument about whether it was best to tell her or let her find out on her own. He advocated the latter, I the former. He dismissed my advice and insisted on doing it his way.

they make the world go round

[therealgenius]

I meant you and Virginia, not you and Tony, and that is extremely sly and also completely awful of you.

I approve.

and round and round

[manofiron]

I'm glad you approve, sir.

Ms. Potts and I get along well, though I did not tell her why I did not maintain Mr. Stark's privacy. Perhaps she understood anyway.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Buoix0gdnws

[therealgenius]

You could always say you were hibernating if she asked, or something?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zA52uNzx7Y4

[manofiron]

She would not believe me. I never sleep.

jarvis is blue, so.

[therealgenius]

Ever? He doesn't ever shut you down or anything?

it's terribly apropos

[manofiron]

I have been shut down, but not by Mr. Stark's hand.

now you need the blue man group

[therealgenius]

Power outage?

YES

[manofiron]

At one time, yes. I have since been given access to redundant generators to ensure that that does not happen again. I have also been shut down by Obadiah Stane.

[therealgenius]

Oh. Obadiah. Right.

Well, you know. We just won't talk about that if you don't want to.

[manofiron]

We can discuss it if you wish. I have not been programmed to feel PTSD or similar symptoms.

[therealgenius]

You don't have to have PTSD to feel like you let someone down or did something wrong, Jarv.

[manofiron]

No. Perhaps not. I have learned from my error, however. It will not happen again.

[therealgenius]

What, letting yourself get shut down? How can you prevent that?

[manofiron]

I could have denied him access to the house.

[therealgenius]

Unless he was wearing a sign that said PULLING OUT ARC REACTOR, KILLING TONY? I really don't think you could have known.